Dreamer

Reality Shows are the best, for me that is. I am tuned in to the Bravo channel everyday. I have to see what these Chef's are cooking. What those rich housewives have done now, and of course project runway. I watch to escape and dream, I want to cook like that, and be rich with my own clothing line that's hot and chic. I am a DREAMER! I like to think of the what if factor and how can I get started now. For now I stand in line trying to make ends meet like everyone else is trying to do. I have applied for almost every job out there. Today I am still looking. I recently applied for a PCT and I am sitting by phone for the interview, this is one dream I want to come true. I would love to work in a hospital helping people my goal in the medical field is become an RN. I want to work in the NICU, I feel I have a real connection to the mothers since I have been where they are. I am young yet in society I am old, and trying to switch my career path so late in life is no easy task and the economic down fall doesn't help.

So I did start working on that poncho finally last night and even though I stared at the pattern all day I made an oops! What the ! Uhh This is a beginner pattern for goodness sakes and I made an oops. So I called my mom the guru for help, because it doesn't make since to me. The pattern wants me to knit and I don't have the right amount stitches. Ya there is something wrong. Time to rip out and start over I hate that part.

These Days

There are times like today I really miss being in CA. I miss being able to go over and visit with friends and family on days like this because I feel so alone. I smoke out of habit and boredom.I hate that I smoke and have quiet twice, so I know quiting the nasty habit isn't going to kill me. This day is boring. I have tons of knitting projects lined up and look forward to working on them, but its so lonely when you can't get the girls over to knit with you. I should clean, but today I am just not in the mood to do anything.

I pulled out this old pattern and yarn to make my daughter a poncho I have read over the pattern like 4 times now and just stare at the words. Nothing, no motivation to do anything. I did vacuum that took a lot. The dishes in the sink right now are driving me crazy knowing they are sitting there and will only pile up if not done now. Oh I am lazy today.

I did push my self to get to my sons doctors appointment on time for his check up for his helmet he wears. He has a condition that has a name I can not pronounce but basically his head is misshaped and the helmet helps round it out. He was a preemie and this was just one of many things I had to deal with and cry about.

I attempted to make a simple a appointment for my husband to see a doctor to follow up on his arm and and see if he will have to have yet another surgery to cut bone back. When he was injured by an IED he lost his elbow and there really isn't much they can do for him. He has no sense of feeling since the nerves are damaged. Well the bone is trying grow back, which he was told would happen and he might have to have the bone cut back so it doesn't come out of his skin. The appointment was no easy task it's not the same for normal people, I call and get asked a bunch of questions, and then all this info, and then you have to start here and wait for this and do this and then you can see a orthopedic doctor. Good GOD. I was so overwhelmed I was so lost when I hung up I wasn't sure what I signed him up for. I am thinking I wasn't the best person call.

It is so one of those days.

Red White & Blue

I have never been one to watch politics but I am glued to my TV over the inauguration. It's history in the making. I would think to be president would be the most exciting thing and scariest you have the weight of the world on your back. I can barley deal with the weight of family.The news reporters are funny they talk about everything right down to how many minuets the president and first lady walked in the parade today the first time was 8 minuets and the second time 7 minuets. That cracks me up. Makes you wounder will that be in a history book for our children to read, will they be tested on that? At least I feel better knowing I will able to answer the question. What's it like to be the president? Living in the White House would have to be pretty cool. I would have to run around and jump for joy just for being in it's presents. If those walls could talk, Right! I have never really traveled, I keep a list of places I want my children to see. I want them to live a full life of adventure, experience and gain knowledge from it. The White House is on my list of places for them to see.

Something nice to know The first lady has said that military families are going to be her first priority, Thank God. Those poor families need some help. Being a wife to a retired military man is no easy task. Even though I didn't go through the tears and sleepless nights while my husband was on the front line, I dealt with the after math of getting him home. I met my husband after he was injured in Iraq. You have a completely different language to learn and no it's not just the time. I had no clue what rank or unit meant. Even though I am not a military wife technically, the first thing you learn when you have a husband that's served in war is that you become one. The war for the guys never goes away they have to live with scares for the rest of their lives and you better find a way to handle the pressure of trying understand them. When they relive the war you relive the war with them you are their support. I cried the first time my husband broke down and told me what he went through. He's my hero.


Back tracking a little My husband and I met on an airplane and his arm was in this brace thing. I gave him my number before I got off the plane for my layover. Thinking he would never call. He did and we spent the next four months on the phone talking and then he came to see me and we fell in love. The next month he proposed and I said YES! We have been married for 3 years now. That was by far the best plane ride in my life.

Sewing in 2009

New things for this new year for me is to learn how to sew. I was watching Project Runway and decided that I was going to spread my creative horizon. Now I am no where near the caliber of those contestants on Project Runway, I will be happy sewing up jeans or a simple purse. With my new Christmas sewing machine my mom threw in some purse patterns and a sewing magazine called Sewing Savvy. I have to say I am so lost. I have no idea where to begin. Do I go buy fabric or should I read more so I know what to even buy. I have been doing my research on the Internet and watched a few You Tube clips on learning how to sew, but I feel a class would really help me grasp the concept better.
This is the case I got to put my sewing machine in. I love bags that have wheels. My dream home would have enough rooms for kids and guests, but my favorite room would be my yarn room. Yarn from floor to ceiling lining the walls and books galore. with a sewing table and a knitting machine, a crafter's dream. I picture the room being part of a guest house with a cottage like setting. A nice little get away from the main house which I am sure would be covered with toys, sort of like my house is now.For now my guests that come to stay are surrounded by my yarn and unable to hang their clothes in the guest closet due to my clear tubs holding even more yarn for future projects. Clutter every where in that room. Some days I go in there and pull everything out just look at all my yarn and my books, after a few hours I put it all back. For now I am waiting to win the lottery.

This is my closet full of yarn and books
This is a dresser that I use to store more yarn. This another dresser type thing I use to for my yarn and needles.

The Funky Scarf

My favorite thing to knit is what I call my "Funky Scarf". I combine the thread for the scarf with the colors and texture I want use and knit away. It's quick easy and I have a clear tub full of them. They make great gifts for family and friends. By now all my family and friends should all have their own tub full of them.

Reading and Writing Fundamentals

I love writing however I can't write. I am horrible with big words and as far as grammar, oh lord help me now! So I write how I talk .. ramble on and on with no breaks and sometimes not making much sense at all. Spell check is my best friend.When I was younger after school I would ask my mom to give a topic to write about, like the sky, a bunny rabbit, my shoes, whatever she could think of. I made up the lamest little stories.So you are pre-warned that I suck at this whole writing thing.

The last time I had a blog I made a comment about these handmade purse's that were being sold like hot cakes, just flying off the shelves. It wasn't a mean comment or anything just jealously I guess. Anyway that's how I found out you really are monitored on the Internet about what you say and who you talk about. I was totally freaked when I read the comment about my little vent ramp aid of jealously I kept looking at my computer waiting for the Internet police to jump out and scold me. So for me to mention a product or name will come rarely if I am not happy with it or jealous of it.

So on this note I am happy to report that even though it's taking me forever I am reading a book that has caught and keeps my attention. My good friend told me about it and one day my mom I were looking at knitting books and poof there it was. My mom was a little confused she was like where are all the patterns. I explained it much more than just patterns, it's a real book and the bonus is the patterns. She was still confused. Whatever mom .. I love you. I walked out that day with my new purchase. That night kids are asleep, Husband is occupied with his own thing I am in bed with my blanket and my book. I laughed my ass off this girl was funny, real, honest and I like her.When it comes to reading a book I find myself reading the same sentence over and over again. I have this mind that likes to picture things, so if it doesn't get the clear picture it won't move on to the next sentence. I had no problem getting the picture with her book. I am in aw of this woman's strength to over come the obstacles in her life. Wanna know what book I am talking about? I have one last thing to share if you are a knitter or not you should go out and buy this book ASAP. Crazy Aunt Purl's Drunk Divorced & Covered in Cat Hair by Laurie Perry. Get a glass of wine and read till 4am. I did!

My Pattern

My style of knitting is the lazy knitter. I love projects that are quick easy to follow and that felt. I have yet to attempt a purse that requires me to line it or add snaps. The purse featured in this blog entry was a one that took attention to detail and I did not give it that. The white part was supposed to be a skull. I clearly missed that one!

I love looking at all my books at the pretty patterns and things I wish I had time to make. It seems like every time I try it just doesn't turn out right. I think I give up mid way. I started making these way cool felted flowers that required extremely small needles. I got to the part that has me using 20 needles at once, my half finished flower now has a place in the pile of "To finish one day". See that's so lazy of me but I need more hands for that many needles and oh my gosh the stitch was making me go crossed eyed. So I stick to the basics easy knit and purl, big needles to med size, easy yarns, and a pattern I know by heart so when I put it down it doesn't matter what I just did cause I'll make up the rest as I go.

From The Beginning

I've been working on starting a blog for sometime now and it's died midway through every time. I love knitting even though I can crochet I feel I follow the patterns of knitter better. I have a bad habit working on any project that requires me to follow a pattern I tend to create my own pattern after the fourth row of purls. Then I end up with this funky purse or scarf that looks a little odd.

Having two children makes anything more complicated. Going to the grocery store, putting the mail in the mail box, reading a book, knitting and having to follow a pattern(that's probably why my purse is lopsided), just about anything I do I must learn to do with one hand, and not having to pay attention to it. Knitting is a challenge. When the kids take a nap I go into turbo speed, I do it all in a hour clean, read, knit, quiet time, shower,eat, and sneak a glass of wine in if it's been a bad day. By bad day I am talking about those days when nothing makes your 2yr old and 9 mo old happy or stop crying.

I learned how to knit and crochet from my mom who at times lacked patience. My mom has been a very crafty person ever since I can remember. She always knitted and crochet, but ventured out and taught me how to make soaps, bath salts, oils, candles, and many other things I don't think there is anything out there she hasn't tried to make. My mom is my knitting guru.

Recently I moved away from California, I moved away from what I've known for years, my familiar areas, family and friends. Now living in Arizona I am learning California people have nothing on these people. I blame the heat for their meanness or maybe it's because there isn't much to do here and no one can escape the desert. California was perfect in my opinion you could drive an hour and be somewhere completely different almost like being on a vacation, my husband disagrees. He couldn't wait to get away from California, but that's because where he was raised it's completely different. A small town setting where everyone is nice and everyone knows your name. I am familiar with the small town living my hometown was only an hour away from his, but I moved to California when I was 10 years old so I adjusted to my surroundings easier. He never did. So when things got tough in the mortgage industry and I was looking at losing my job soon as a escrow processor I was thinking maybe we should get out before things get too bad. Not so lucky I was pregnant and just my luck my son came earlier, my husband lost his job before me, and our mortgage was way too much. So two months after my son was born we moved.

So here I am in Tucson unfamiliar with anything or anyone starting over. This is my new beginning.